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You know there are a lot of good qualities about human nature.  Most all human beings see to thrive on sheer will of survival.  When lives are out of danger we will even go out of our way to keep others thriving.  For the most part are all are ambassadors to the preservation of human life.

But what happens when we’ve fallen off the wagon for way too long and realize by way of a doctor’s visit that we have to get back on it or else?   What happens when you get to a point where you receive a diagnosis of diabetes, morbid obesity, high blood pressure or cancer.

The most common response is to do something, but what exactly do you do.  Some go to the gym and some seek a personal trainer, which is a positive step in the right direction.  But most, while trying to change their lives for the better still try to hold on to the things that are slowly killing them.

Some give up all their bad habits and receive one good report from the doctor or a great evaluation from a trainer, then feel as though they are allowed to go back to their bad habits that were harming their bodies.  There are others who improve their health, but their friends and family make them feel guilty about it and in order to balance other’s feelings they sacrifice their health.

Allow me to illustrate with a true story…

The names will be omitted to protect the innocent and my pocket book.  For over three-years, I’ve been working with a client who weighed over 300 pounds when she started when she started.  Initially she dropped 20 pounds and appeared to be enjoying not have severe pain in the knees because of it.  She was even able to get up and down to the floor with no problem.  One day she wanted to show her friends how she could get up from the floor without assistance

The day she performed her feet in front of her friends, which should have been a motivator, she heard from her friends, “Now you know your doctor ain’t gonna approve of that,” “Your trainer is crazy for making you do that at your age.” “Girl don’t you know you a still to heavy to be doing that!”

When she came back the following week to resume training she did not seem motivated to push herself.  After her floor stretches she was hesitant to get up on her own.  This continued for week, to my frustration, and after a while I noticed regression.

Constantly Jumping on a scale will only lead to more stress and self-sabotage

Constantly Jumping on a scale will only lead to more stress and self-sabotage

I was so angry I had to have a heart to heart with the woman.  When she told me what her friends had said, I immediately asked her to tell me the ailments her friends are dealing with.

She told me that one has high blood pressure and on numerous pills, one had diabetes and uses a cane, and the other was extremely obese.  That’s when she had her “light bulb” moment.  She realized sabotaged herself.  Her friends did nothing but set the atmosphere for her to fall in her own trap.

She refocused and began losing weight again.  I even introduced her to a raw food nutritionist and she dropped even more weight.  When I evaluated her she gained muscle and lost fat.  She told me she was feeling better than ever, but was concerned that she was losing too much weight so she went to her doctor.


When she returned for training she let me know that the doctor wanted her back on her medications.  She was advised to get back to her normal eating regimen.  She was even told to limit standing exercises.  There was a part of me that did not believe this, but I followed doctor’s orders.   From there came more cancellations for road trips with her buddies.

A couple of months had passed with this regressive behavior.   It was time to evaluate her once more.  Her weight came back and then some.  She began crying and asked why this was happening.  All I could do was retrace her steps for her.  Once again she acknowledged that she self sabotaged.   She even admitted to presenting a negative picture to her positive results so her doctor could put her right back on her mental crutches.  I don’t ever want to see this doctor.

This is not a new concept.  Many people in many ways sabotage themselves, myself included.  I remember talking myself out of a championship boxing match.  I fought the match, but lost because I allowed a negative outcome to play in my head before the match started.  After that experience, I never allowed that to happen again and I eventually redeemed myself the following year.   How often do we do that to ourselves in other facets in our lives: our marriages, friendships, work environments and yes our health.

The anecdote is simple but I recognize the process is not.  The key is to acknowledge the benefits of your progress and continuing to act on it.  In that realization there are other changes you have to make.  It may be a change in social relationships that coincide with your lifestyle as you change for the better.  It may be a finding a physician that will actually hold you accountable.  When you self-sabotage you have plenty of negative items to pull from to keep you down.  The same must apply when you begin self-promoting.  You have to be prepared to establish resources that will be positive to draw from.  It does take work but I know you can do it!

On a positive note, my client has made the changes to be successful.  She may have lost one of her friends but she leads the others in daily walks.  She is back on a consistent nutritional plan and the reports from her communication wit her doctor is positive.

Stop self-sabotaging and start self-promoting!

You don’t have to be a fighter to feel like one.  So let’s train!

For more on CJ and CJ’s Functional Fitness go to or cal 1.424.456.7306.

One thought on “Self-Sabotage

  1. I think women unconsciously try to push men away. We use men just like they use us, but in deinerfft ways. Sometimes we find men to use as a diversion. Feeling bad about someone distracts us from feeling bad about more important things. It almost keeps us addicted like a drug because it will bring a feeling although not always a good one but a feeling nonetheless. And whatever the feeling is- its a distraction! Sometimes the distraction might feel good. But the whole thing is a big ugly cycle. And going through this cycle totally blows, but when your life is back on track you will make good decisions and be happy.

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